By John Prager / 01.11.2017
Russia — you know, that country whose leader orchestrated a hack of Donald Trump’s political opponents and an aggressive propaganda/fake news campaign in an effort to install The Donald in the Oval Office — has finally spoken out about revelations that the President-elect was once busted paying Russian prostitutes to pee in front of him.
A Vladimir Putin spokesman said Wednesday that they have no “compromising materials” on Donald Trump at all — or Hillary Clinton, for that matter (which we already know, because it would have been released alongside everything else Wikileaks dumped if they did).
“No, the Kremlin has no compromising materials on Trump,” presidential spokesman Dmitry Peskov said in response to the reports, which claim that the Kremlin has been cultivating and working on compromising Trump for a number of years. “This is absolutely fake information, a fabrication and complete nonsense. The Kremlin does not engage in gathering compromising materials.”
“It is an obvious attempt to harm our bilateral relations. The quality of the public version of the previous report and this hoax is comparable. In English, it is called pulp fiction,” Peskov told Russian propaganda blog Sputnik. Sure, the manner of this denial completely ignores that collecting compromising information on individuals is kind of the Kremlin’s “thing” and has been since before kids were taught to hide underneath their desks to protect from a nuclear blast and sure, it would be stupid for Russia to reveal what they have on Trump while he is still useful, The Donald absolutely ate up this message of support from the same people who helped him win the election.
“Russia just said the unverified report paid for by political opponents is ‘A COMPLETE AND TOTAL FABRICATION, UTTER NONSENSE,’ Trump said in his traditional morning meltdown. “Very unfair!”
Russia just said the unverified report paid for by political opponents is “A COMPLETE AND TOTAL FABRICATION, UTTER NONSENSE.” Very unfair!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017
“Russia has never tried to use leverage over me,” said the guy who reportedly plans to lessen or eliminate sanctions against Russia in the early parts of his presidency and who has appointed people. “I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH RUSSIA – NO DEALS, NO LOANS, NO NOTHING!”
Russia has never tried to use leverage over me. I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH RUSSIA – NO DEALS, NO LOANS, NO NOTHING!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017
Deals or no deals, Trump spent the entire time running up to the election and after praising Vladimir Putin and Russia while attacking our President and our intelligence agencies — especially after more than a dozen of the latter confirmed that Russia orchestrated the election hack to assist Trump in winning. Almost every single person he appointed to important positions is confirmed to have ties — mostly business-related — to his BFF Putin’s country.
Though Putin barely won the election in terms of electoral votes with one of the worst margins in history and lost the popular vote, he reminded the Stupid Part of America that he won “easily” that that his “movement” (probably not the right term to use in light of the “golden showers” story) is “verified.”
I win an election easily, a great “movement” is verified, and crooked opponents try to belittle our victory with FAKE NEWS. A sorry state!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017
Then, the guy who actually plans to have a national Muslim registry, who has the almost full support of Nazis and white supremacists around the country, who wants to ban an entire religion from entering the United States, who spends time characterizing brown people to the south of us as rapists and murderers, who has offered to pay supporters’ legal fees if they beat up black people at his rallies, and whose “Make America Great Again” catchphrase was literally lifted from Adolf Hitler’s speeches, actually said this:
Intelligence agencies should never have allowed this fake news to “leak” into the public. One last shot at me.Are we living in Nazi Germany?
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017
Are we living in Nazi Germany? Not for a little over a week, anyway. Naturally, Twitter couldn’t resist beating Trump to a bloody pulp of the man he once was…with words, of course:
.@realDonaldTrump You. Are. Going. To. Regret. This. Tweet.
— Simon Hedlin (@simonhedlin) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump man, “leak” is a really poor choice of words here.
— Alex Zalben (@azalben) January 11, 2017
.@realDonaldTrump You hired an antisemitic chief strategist and are supported by an army of neo-Nazi trolls, so, yeah, the vibe is very 1934
— Lauren Duca (@laurenduca) January 11, 2017
Intelligence agencies should never have allowed this fake news to “leak” into the public. One last shot at me.Are we living in Nazi Germany?
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump I’m in disbelief. This is scary. All must see. #maddow #Resist pic.twitter.com/JoOiyo7nYE
— Lil’ Kim Ms. G.O.A.T (@killerbee805) January 11, 2017
@JeffreyGuterman @realDonaldTrump Perhaps “leak” is too evocative a verb here, Golden President?
— Fake President (@AloisiusBarnes) January 11, 2017
@MattRichardson3 do you reckon they keep taking his tech away but he’s got hundreds squirrelled away all over Trump tower? @realDonaldTrump
— Kay Dalton (@keishadalton02) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump Hah. Leak. You do realise you will never live this down right? Four years of piss jokes. Glorious.
— Ethan Lawrence (@EthanDLawrence) January 11, 2017
Er…
Word of advice
I’d steer clear of the word “leak” if I were you.
(You used to really like @wikileaks too) @realDonaldTrump
— Peter Jukes (@peterjukes) January 11, 2017
Ok, @realDonaldTrump just accidentally made a pee joke https://t.co/HAnnWmT0xn
— Evan O’Connell ❄️ (@evanoconnell) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump “Are we living in Nazi Germany?” pic.twitter.com/j6zAeOJmoC
— Charles Gaba (@charles_gaba) January 11, 2017
.@realDonaldTrump Easy #Trump, we know ur pissed, but urine great hands w/ @KellyannePolls. No worries. You’re golden.
— Andy Ostroy (@AndyOstroy) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump You’re pissed about this leak of news streaming out? Worried urine trouble? Hey, at least you’re #1. #1 all over the place.
— Aaron Gouveia (@DaddyFiles) January 11, 2017
.@realDonaldTrump Please tell us more about how Nazis operate. pic.twitter.com/SDgqHEvJFl
— Hend Amry (@LibyaLiberty) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump if it’s fake news how could they prevent it from fake leaking?
— Hanna Flint (@HannaFlint) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump “Are we living in Nazi Germany?” pic.twitter.com/e15EhjpwLn
— Charles Gaba (@charles_gaba) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump We will be, GropenFuhrer, if you’re allowed into office. You’re a TRAITOR, & a fake-gold-plated fool. #NotMyPresident
— Rae Busch (@GammaRae206) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump Not yet, but give it 10 days or so.
— Baz McAlister (@bazmcalister) January 11, 2017
.@realDonaldTrump Definitely not the last shot at you, champ. Nazi Germany? Have you seen you? Ethnic cleansing. Master race. Giant wall…
— James Hance (@JimJeroo) January 11, 2017
.@realDonaldTrump Man, you have not the slightest clue how the ruling class of Nazi Germany dealt with political opposition, do you?
— Sakölabo (@Sakoelabo) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump I mean the irony is dripping off the screen… #GoldenShowers #PEOTUS #donaldtrump
— Frank Martinelli (@FPMartinelli27) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump No, the Nazi regime in the US doesn’t start until 20 January.
— Tim Mullen (@Tim_Mullen) January 11, 2017
@realDonaldTrump haha. You said Russian “Leak”. So naughty. #goldenboy
— Darren Rigger (@DarrenRigger) January 11, 2017
Trump didn’t explain how “fake news” can be “leaked” by intelligence agencies, but one thing is for certain — all these pee-ple are probably right that his administration will likely resemble a society under Adolf Hitler. Everything from the way he threatens the press to the way he encourages his fans to violently beat dissenters to his use of propaganda just screams “fourth reich.” In just over a week, our country is going to be a bigger mess than a certain bed in a certain hotel room in Moscow.